Survive
by Skippy the Intolerant Lesbian
Summary: It's amazing how only one person can keep everyone together in harmony. It's also amazing how when that person is removed, everyone is effected, though some more than others.


Summary: It's amazing how only one person can keep everyone together in harmony. It's also amazing how when that person is removed, everyone is effected, though some more than others.

Skippy's Words: I've got nothin' in thought…well, that's not true, I was playin' Sonic with my boyfriend-who is understanding in the fact that he is dating a yaoi fangirl gamer though he will not let me play any of his favorite games because I'll ruin it for him-and poof! The idea hit me like a ton of bricks…except I lived. I'm so excited about this. Now, this story is not gonna have as much drama as 'Get Out Alive' but it will have some emotional strain. I did try to keep everyone in character the best I could given the situation so yeah. I'm gonna have so much funXD

Please appreciate this. I actually had to make a timeline so I wouldn't get confused, there was a lot of planning and a lot of coffee beans have sacrificed their lives to make this happen. So please read and review. I spent a lotta time on this and I am actually quite proud at how it came out. Even if it had turned out longer than I had expected. It doubled in sized from my estimation.

Disclaimer: The awesome song belongs to Sick Puppies, not me. But you peoples should really check it out*grins* Sonic the Hedgehog and all of it's characters belong to the SEGA and Sonic Team. Should really thank Sega for selling the very beginning which started this wonderful thing…for me.

Yay SEGA!

Warning: This isn't my usual story, so there is no sex. Sorry. It is rated M because of the content. Lots of it. It's content is all over the place, and kinda jumps all over. And language. Lots of that also. This is obviously a yaoi, and Shadow/Sonic is not the only one mentioned. This may offend people, I'm not sure, I just want to cover myself on this. Lot of drama.

Survive

The sun shines brightly, having shown itself many hours ago. In fact, it was well into morning, roughly noon, and most anthros were hustling about going on about their business. With just enough clouds to provide temporary shade, it seemed that everyone was outside to enjoy such a wondrous day that July granted. Children played on the sidewalks, adults either already at work or walking to just enjoy the warm air. City animals keeping to themselves as well, digging into the garbage or things dropped by children who were too busy to notice they had even dropped their snacks.

The city was full of life.

However much of that life thrived, it totally eluded a certain black hedgehog, who had not only shut the blinds in his apartment but also pulled the curtains over said blinds to prevent any light from penetrating the dark apartment. The only light needed was the artificial light from light bulbs. In the depths of the dark apartment on the top floor of the building-floor 22-Shadow the Hedgehog sleeps restlessly in his messy bed. Black sheets, black blankets, black pillow cases-Shadow just seemed to melt right in with his resting place. The red streaked creature rolls over, lazy limbs-or perhaps just numb-flop to the bed with a soft thud, resting against the bed. The room is almost entirely dark, the only light being the dim lighting from the alarm clock. The soft blue luminosity stretching across the surface of the nightstand it rested on and the charcoal bed sheets nearby, falling upon a few of the limbs carelessly lazed about.

The tranquility of the room was rather dull, the pace of time seemed to have stopped ages ago. With the events that had pursued the raven hedgehog, that may have just been enough to stop time itself. It nearly stopped the world in fact.

The lifeless body was forced to move as the alarm clock suddenly went off, a rock station at full blast blaring into the once silence room, stirring the body at peace. Black lids scarcely open to reveal worn down eyes of red. With a few startled blinks, Shadow cranes his neck over to see the clock he had foolishly set last night. Apparently he had really wanted to get up because it was not only plugged in but set as well. As the rock band played on, Shadow's ears revert away from the noise, not fully capable of being able to turn off the alarm. Bloodshot eyes gaze over the room to see nothing but darkness though he knew it was noon. That seemed to be the only time he set his alarm clock at though he never really remembers doing such a dumb thing.

Now capable of functioning, Shadow reaches over to the little box screaming at him, grasping it in his bare hand. With a violent jerk, the sound was cut off before the clock was chucked across the room only to crack against the floor. With an frustrated groan, The Ultimate Life Form gets out of bed, moving slowly to the bathroom.

After nearly blinding himself with the light, the black hedgehog looks at himself in the mirror, something he rarely bothers with any more. Bloodshot eyes that are now dead and disheveled fur sticking every which way were what greeted the dark creature. Thought Shadow did not need food as a necessity and neither was sleep, it was clear that he was in need of them now as much as a shower. He had lived for almost ten years eating three times a day and sleeping every night though he had a few all nighters while he worked at G.U.N. A while ago, Shadow suddenly quit G.U.N. and ended up living in his apartment, which wasn't that bad. It was a two bedroom and well furnished. Then his eating habits slowed as did his rest, and his body did not have the time to adjust. Eventually his bioengineered body adjusted only it had to fight off other things Shadow did to his body.

Lips curling into a snarl as fangs poke out of the corner of his mouth, Shadow's hands ball into a tight fist, anger filling him with every passing second he gazed into the mirror. Gazed at how far he had fallen and what he had become. All because the one he loved had to just leave him. Abandon him though Sonic had no clue he had done such a thing.

Memories flooded Shadow in an instant upon recalling rather traumatizing events from so long ago. Sonic had left. Less than a week before that Shadow had confessed his feelings to the blue hero. Told him everything. Shadow had let himself open, allowing information that had been held tightly for years to just spill out. The raven hedgehog knew that Sonic had just broken up with Amy but they were still friends. She didn't understand his need to be a hero and to be free. She wanted a family, which meant he had to stay home. Get a job. A real job. Sonic did not want that. When Shadow had offered his feelings, it took the cobalt hero for a loop. They had been friends, yes, but they never really hung out. Sure, Shadow had attended the parties that Amy and Rouge put together, and he often spoke to Sonic during those parties and during adventures but it was still the last thing that Sonic had expected to hear from Shadow the Ultimate Life Form.

Ten years had passed since the day they first met, and during the ten years, it seemed that little changed as everyone grew up, the only teen in the group now being Tails and Cream. During that time, Shadow had allowed himself to get closer to his cobalt counterpart, who had grown quite a lot when growing into his late teen years to his early twenties. Shadow was quite embarrassed being the same age and size, having to look up to see everyone around him, even Cream. Asking Tails for help, he had literally asked him to help his appearance be a tad older than what he was. Tails knew the awkwardness of looking so young despite being much older. So he tried. With Shadow's blue prints of his design, Tails tinkered and eventually was able to make a machine that would do what Shadow desired. His abilities were not effected in any way. Immediately, Shadow went to find Sonic, able to confess himself without looking like a love struck teen asking an adult out. The hero was surprised in not only his appearance but what was asked of him also.

Sonic had told him that he had to really think about what was said and that he'd give him an answer to his request of partnership in a week. And so the two parted.

And Shadow never saw him again.

A low growl grows quickly, quickly forming a shout as a fist raises. With a swift movement a red streaked fist found it's way into the mirror, shattering it across the floor. The fragments flew into the air, around the black being in the room. Shards gashed into fur, some of it impaling into the flesh from the force alone. With noisy clatters, the broken mirror finds the ground and on Shadow's bare feet, settling the air with the once false tranquil air.

Piercing red eyes stare into his right hand. He felt no pain, only heat finding it's way to his skin. The prickling feeling surfacing only in his hand and forearm. Shadow struggles to keep his temper under control, something he had lost long ago. So much that he no longer had friends. Sonic's friends never really bothered with him, he only had one. Rouge cut off all contact with Shadow upon discovering his lifestyle-or more so addiction. When she went to talk to Shadow about it and brought up Maria, he lost it. He never would have pictured himself hitting a friend much less a girl. After sending the bat girl to the hospital, she never bothered to speak to him again. And as far as Shadow was concerned, it was for the best. His only friend was Tails. The small fox seemed to have adopted Shadow as a new older brother, and often checked in on him, even after what happened to Rouge and Knuckles. Shadow actually didn't mind Tails that much. He knew how to keep his own business and had a good head on his shoulders, being pure in his decisions.

Red catches the attention of Shadow, who is lost in thought. Upon looking down, he sees liquid red dribbling down into the bowl of the sink. Shadow watches for a moment as blood trickles out of his small wounds, some of them bubbling around the few shards jetting out of his skin and fur. It wasn't constant or fast pace, but the blood was finding it's way down his appendage only to fall of dark fur into the marble sink. With a sigh, Shadow finds his peace, reaching for the mirror fragments in his arm, pulling them out carelessly, dropping them into the sink.

Once that was done, the ring inhibitors are removed and placed onto the sink, the tired creature finding his way into the tub. With a lazy turn to the hot water knob, Shadow places the rubber plug in the drain and watches as the tub fill slowly with hot water. Groaning lowly to himself, Shadow lifts his leg over the side of the tube, doing the same with the other as he sinks into the hot water. Usually, the male creature finds the tub used for cold baths and even then it was to wake himself up. He rarely got sleep though he spent most of his time in bed. He couldn't help but wonder where everything had gone wrong. Things were okay at first. Somewhere along the line strings were pulled just too much and snapped, dropping everything they held. And Shadow couldn't help but blame himself. Losing himself in thought for a short amount of time, the crimson streaked creature is snapped out of his thoughts by running water. Waking up, red eyes pick up on a nearly full bath tub, arms reaching out to quickly turn off the rushing water. Once silence kicks in, Shadow lets himself sink into the scorching hot water, a feeling of suffocation nearly taking him in doing so.

He let his mind wonder yet again, like it often does when he is _clean_.

Nearly two and a half years ago, Sonic went missing. Just like that, Sonic the Hedgehog seemed to have fallen off the face of the earth. And everything just fell apart. Without Sonic and his carefree nature to keep the peace, everyone seemed to just fall apart, with no one to try and keep them together. Friends fought, they argued, sometimes violently either with their words or actions. Things just couldn't work anymore. Wouldn't work anymore.

At month four, Sonic was declared dead, sending the whole world into a state of mourning. So many people were devastated though not as much as the blue male's friends. Or Shadow.

Everything just started to fail after that, along with the feeling of peace.

The Ultimate Life Form couldn't care less about the state of the world at that time. He could only keep up the search party that all of Sonic's friends participated in. no one would give up, but their spirits eventually lingered away, fading with time.

And what was worse, Shadow was helpless as he was only able to watch everyone break and fall apart, only to become a victim himself. And even though Sonic's friends had their pretty bad fallouts, the raven creature had the worst. Everyone else had fallen, hit rock bottom and was blessed with the chance to stand on solid ground and build themselves back up. Shadow watched helplessly as his friends gave up their search, believing the hero to be dead as well. Sonic's search party was shrinking and there was nothing the Ultimate Life Form could to about it. He had somehow managed to tell himself that Sonic was still alive, no matter how much time had passed. He still believed that, only with a few substances, he had simply forgotten that fact, his pain eased away. The professor had once told him that rock bottom was a good solid ground to stand on. It seemed that everyone else got that ground.

Shadow was still falling. And falling fast.

_I've had too many days_

_Where I'm ready to break_

_There's gotta be more_

_There's gotta be more_

_So I ingest everything_

'_Cause I'm in it to win_

_Nothing but time on my side_

_Anywhere I choose_

'_Cause I wasn't built to lose_

_And you think I'm going to fall_

_Face down on the floor_

_Just because I'm _

_Hi hi_

Again, the feeling of suffocation fills the dark creature. The feeling was urgent, causing the creature to panic and even thrash. Yet again, Shadow is torn from this thoughts of the past, only this time rather violently. It took him a moment to realize that he had fallen asleep in the bathtub. He had some trouble reaching for the sides, struggling to keep a grip on the smooth and slippery material, water flooding the bathroom floor in the process. The moment a grasp is found, Shadow hauls himself up, gasping for air as he coughs up the water he had swallowed either in his sleep or during the struggle. After his racing heart is calmed, the startled creature realizes the water is no longer warm. Reaching his skinny arm forward, he grabs onto the plug and pulls it out, setting it in it's place in the edge. Stepping out of the tub rather sluggishly, Shadow staggers out of the white tub, slipping his inhibitors back onto his wet wrists. He then leaves the bathroom, towel in hand. Tired eyes scanning the hallway to the living room, Shadow drags the charcoal gray towel through his sopping wet fur, not at all bothered with the water on the bathroom floor, which soaks the carpet in the hallway.

Though his fur was still damp, Shadow tosses the towel on the kitchen table, making his way to the mini fridge he owned. He had no clue as to why he did such a thing but then again, a drink sounded good right about now. He normally tires to keep the past in the past, fighting off those damn flashbacks. Normally those where of Maria, but recently they had been about Sonic and his useless friends. Pulling open the door, crimson eyes rested upon multiple bottles of strong liquor in different colored bottles. Not bothering with the kind, he reaches in, grabs one at random and shuts the door.

Before even returning to his bedroom, Shadow had the bottle opened, the opening pressed to his lips, allowing the rank liquid to enter his system. With a disconcerting grunt, he flips the switch to his room and sits on his couch, which he had moved from the living room when he didn't want to be on the bed any longer. Fully settled onto the dark sofa, Shadow's lips connect with the bottle once again, downing the alcohol much quicker than what most creatures physically can considering the effects and taste alone. Pulling the green glass away, Shadow lets out a deep sigh, which burns his lungs and nose.

He knew that today was going to be slow. Slow just like every other day he was forced to live through for the past two years. He allowed a few hours to pass, the bottle emptied long ago. The effect of alcohol only has a slight turn on Shadow. Designed to fight off most outside substances, the drink only calms him down, the only physical change is his breath. With heavy thoughts, Shadow looks over to his clock to check the time, only to find it gone. He then catches sight of it on the floor. With a shake of his head, the bioengineered creature gets to his feet, over to his dresser. The three layered box was usually only used by females, seeing as how they actually wear clothes. The bottom drawer was full of cash that he had gotten while playing hero for a while, his time at G.U.N. and cash that was left on the ARK, leaving him quite wealthy. The cash had over flown the bottom shelf to the middle one, which was also full of his white gloves and socks seeing as for some reason he keeps losing them or ruining them. And the top dresser was full of what Shadow used to escape the pain of his everyday life. A rather costly thing though it wasn't to Shadow. Physically that is.

Pulling open the top dresser, emptied syringes come into view. Beside them were neatly piled bags and containers of pills of different colors with different signatures etched into their surfaces. His preferred mean of escape being what was in those empty syringes. The pills and powder was just a way to numb himself when needed when he was too busy or if he was too sore.

Again, being the Ultimate Life Form, most substances don't affect him in full, his body able to fight off the effects of things such as poisons, toxic chemicals, pollution, sedatives, and drugs.

Including crystal methamphetamine.

This is what Rouge and Shadow had argued about. The drugs. Shadow had quite his job as an agent and quite his active searching for Sonic to drown himself in mind altering substances. Shadow had basically stopped his way of life because of drugs, and Rouge was very disappointed in the dark creature. He had been 'addicted' to the stuff for almost eight months by this time. When she had tried to get Shadow in rehab, he flat out denied her saying he could quite whenever he wanted to, however, the need or want to quit had never surfaced. Rouge pressed on. And when she had done so, she had mentioned Maria. All she said was that the blonde would be disappointed in him. And that's all she _had _to say. That's when Shadow had lost it. It's also when the bat girl did not take into account that one of the long term effects that drugs have in the mind is aggression and psychotic behavior. Within seconds, she was beaten and within the hour she was in the hospital.

She too had walked out on Shadow.

With a rather annoyed huff, Shadow gazes over the syringes. After the morning he had, he knew he'd need a strong pick me up and the simple heroin or LSD will do nothing for him. Not since his body managed to fight off it's effects quicker than he wanted. Simply because he had already paid cash for the shit and now it was almost totally useless. Sure, it calmed him down but not the way it use to.

About this time Shadow makes the connection as to why he had set the alarm clock. He needed to purchase more crystal meth. Closing the dresser rather slowly, Shadow then opens the second dresser, grabbing onto some cash, just enough needed to buy enough to get him through this Sonic phase again. Without bothering with his gloves, he grabs a pair of clean-or more accurately new- socks, slamming the dresser shut causing the lamp to rattle. Stopping for a second to put on his socks, Shadow then walking out of his room after turning off the light. He'd have to worry or he'd miss his dealer though he was rather shameless and random with his hours depending on the weather and month…and time of day…and if he was feeling lazy for the day. Once in the kitchen, the Ultimate Life Form reaches for his hover skates, moving them from the rack onto the floor. Without much effort, Shadow slides his feet into the correct skate, wiggling his toes once they have fitted inside. Folding the money in his hand, the dark furred creature slips the cash into his sock, tucked firmly beyond the cuff of his shoes.

Once content with his appearance, Shadow leaves his apartment, locking it before venturing down the hallway, tucking the key into his head quills where things like paper and money cannot go in since they are fragile enough to get torn and ruined. Sauntering past the elevator, Shadow makes his way down the stairs, starting the long-and most likely frustrating-walk down twenty two flights of stairs.

_As for me_

_I have to disagree_

Upon the first flights of stairs, Shadow's sober mind had wondered far more than he had let it in so long. It wondered to the point where it had all began.

With Rouge.

They declared Sonic dead at month four. And with two more months in searching and abandoning her job, Rouge had dispatched from her friends to return to work. While everyone was at a meeting about any leads or rumors, she had waltzed in with the saddest look on her face. Though Shadow looks back at it now and realizes that the look was pity. At month six, only month six, Rouge had given up her search for Sonic the Hedgehog, world's greatest hero. Though her best friend had hated and the fact drove him crazy, Shadow accepted the white bat's decission to quit, allowing her to move on and still stay friends.

Her boyfriend held on longer than most of Sonic's friends. Finally, after just a tad longer than a year, Knuckles the echidna gave up his own search, retreating back to Angel Island after a long time of abandoning the temple since he no longer had to worry about Eggman. Shadow held no reservations toward the red rodent and his decission to give up. He had his own responsibilities and he had helped search longer than everyone else, all except Tails and Shadow that is. It was clear that Knuckles had worn himself out, digging and gliding most of his free time, desperate to find his best friend. He was infuriated when Rouge had told him ahead of time that she was quitting but there was nothing he could do about it. He had to live with it as much as he hated the fact.

A few months later Rouge had visited him just after a mission to tell him some news. She was pregnant. Knuckles was quite happy with the news having well enough time to realize that yes, Sonic was gone. It didn't matter if he was dead or if he was plain and simple gone-odds of him returning was low. The two had argued a bit. Knuckles wanted her to live with him on the island so he could take care of the emerald, her and their child in the safety of the island. He had also wanted her to quit her dangerous job and become a nurse, like she had wanted to a while ago. Rouge, on the other hand, wanted him to leave the island so the two of them could get a house to raise a family, her keeping her job as a G.U.N. agent. The argument was little so they decided they would wait and see what happens.

And they did, which had torn the engaged couple apart.

After a long time gone for a mission G.U.N. thought fit for her, Rouge decided to check up on Shadow before seeing Knuckles simply because she hadn't seen him since she had left the search team. She knew that Shadow-for some odd reason-kept his search though it now seemed half-hearted and desperate.

And she quickly found out why.

When she wondered in, she noticed some things about Shadow that she would not have seen nearly a decade ago. The dark creature seemed undernourished, if possible. Booze filled the kitchen air along with the thick scent of incense, causing Rouge to blink away the irritant. His house was spotless just as it always was but darker than what Shadow had usually allowed. The blinds were closed as where the curtains. She could have sworn that her friend preferred those open, so that he could enjoy what Maria could not-a view of the city and the world being on the top floor. The bat girl tried to make conversation but it didn't go as well as it should have. The girl didn't like how Shadow the Hedgehog-the Ultimate Life Form-could not pay attention, could not stay focused. Upon looking around again, she found that hard liquor surrounded her, or more accurately, Shadow. He had hidden the stuff all over his apartment that only the trained eye could see without difficulty. Turning around, she spotted the kitchen counter and table. The surface was littered with different kinds of liquor, each empty, some laying on their sides.

That wasn't the worst of it.

As she tried to ignore it, Rouge sat on the chair as Shadow rested on the love seat, managing to stay focused enough to listen to his friend rant on about work. He had totally forgotten that he had just taken a hit of crystal meth not too long ago. As the thought crossed his mind, he tried to recall exactly where he had put that syringe. The Ultimate Life Form didn't bother with snorting, deciding it was just a ridiculous idea from the start. And the idea of smoking was just unacceptable to him considering Maria had once stated that she hated smoke. It just kinda stuck in his head. The pills weren't that bad but took to long for the stuff to kick in for him. Injecting the stuff into his muscle or blood stream was much easier and had a much quicker activation. And Shadow never cared for needles. As time increased, he grew to like them. They brought him relive from all his pain and misery though he had nearly forgotten why he turned them in the first place, however, sobriety had brought the horrid memory back.

Then he recalled where he left the syringe.

Only because Rouge was screaming at him.

Before they knew it, the two were arguing, one infuriated and beyond pissed, and the hormonal unbalance didn't help that at all. The arguing escalated to extreme heights and somehow Shadow had managed to keep to himself. Even though she had accused him of being addicted and stupid. Called him a loser who needs to grow up. Called him many things. He kept his temper. He wanted nothing to do with rehab simply because Shadow knew he was not addicted. He knew he was abusing the substance, and he knew why and that it was a horrible idea however he also knew that his body could fight off many things, and he had an assumption that he would only be affected by short-term effects, and not the long-term effects simply because his body would not allow itself to be damaged and if so, it would simply build itself back up.

However much he kept his temper in check, one thing triggered the shear anger inside the dark creature. And that was the mention of Maria. Rouge threw that in his face and she had expected it to turn Shadow's head in hopes that he will listen to her. Instead, it enraged him to no end. Truth was, he _had _thought of what Maria would think of him. He _knew _she would be disappointed in him. He _knew _she would be mad. All that knowledge did was make Shadow take more in hopes of drowning every memory, or at least until he could no longer recall Sonic or Maria. It was an act of desperation to keep his sanity.

Shadow had lost it, and in Rouge's direction. In a blind rage, he had let his fists fall upon the girl, who never stood a chance. And the both of them knew it.

Once he snapped out of his thoughts, he looked around, almost confused as to what had just happened. He noticed that his best friend was knocked out, bloodied and bruised by his hands. Startled by what he had done, he quickly rushed his friend to the hospital only to run off quickly, like the coward he had allowed himself to become.

Rouge woke up in the hospital a few days later, only to get the horrid memories of what she had to endure from her best friend, ex-boyfriend, and ex-partner as an agent. And when she was questioned by the police about what had happened, she had said she was jumped by some guy while walking over to Shadow's place, knowing it was him who had dropped her off at the hospital. She didn't entirely blame him. She knew it was the drugs and alcohol, and knew that she shouldn't have pressed the anxious hedgehog like she did. The nurse had told her that she had a fractured collar bone, a dislocated wing junction, a broken wrist and suffered much blood loss. Rouge would have to stay in the hospital longer. G.U.N. took many statements, wanting to get to the bottom of the fact that someone had attacked one of their best agents off duty. They never even suspected Shadow, and Rouge gave them no reason to. After a long day, her doctor came in to check up on her. After some small talk on her curiosity of becoming a nurse since she probably wouldn't be able to show her face in G.U.N. with her pride and dignity. The doctor then gave her the bad news.

She had lost the baby.

The man left after getting Rouge to sign for the surgery papers, leaving the female in tears. Within a few hours, Knuckles came barging in. It took the red male so long because He had no phone on Angel Island so when Tails heard the news, he hopped in his X-Tornado to tell him.

He was also upset that the baby had been lost, but he was thankful that Rouge had lived and that Shadow had dropped her off at the hospital, figuring that she was either on her way to visit him or leaving his place to visit him.

Rouge had a very important decission to make. To tell Knuckles that Shadow had done this to her or some random guy. She knew for sure that Knuckles would confront the older male, and also knew that Shadow had already shared his opinion of the echidna, and that opinion was piss poor. She also knew full well from experience that while high, the raven creature had no control in himself. So she told the lie.

And that was what caused her life to shatter to pieces.

Immediately Knuckles had made up his mind on the fact that Rouge was only attacked because she was a G.U.N. agent. She was not robbed, only beaten, so it was only natural that this attack was personal. And this was exactly the reason why the male wanted his girl to quit her job as an agent. Rouge did nothing to defend herself out of fear that she would slip up. She was already in tears, the stress of discovering her best friend is an addict to drugs-crystal meth and angel dust for sure because they are what she had found located in Shadow's apartment not to mention the many bottles of booze, the thought that said best friend had literally beaten her baby out of her, and that her boyfriend was screaming at her in her hospital room.

The next thing she knew, she was alone, to upset to even cry.

Knuckles had abandoned her. He had broken up with her and left her. Just like that. All because she had to open her mouth in something that had nothing to do with her like she always did. Only this time she suffered the consequences in full.

Within the hour, her friend Topaz was by her side in the hospital room like any best friend would. Unlike someone who had put her in one.

Rouge had decided once.

She would quit G.U.N. and go to school to be a nurse.

And never speak to Shadow the Hedgehog again.

Having only reached about the halfway point of the stairs, Shadow shakes his head to free himself of the thoughts that plagued him. He knew why Rouge had decided to never speak to him again though he did not know about the baby. He was a little lonely after Tails had informed him that Rouge had signed up for college after dropping G.U.N. just like he had. Shadow couldn't help but feel that he would meet her again only this time, not as partner, not as friends, not as friendly ex's, and not as friendly acquaintances. The next time he would see her he would be the one on the hospital bed and she'd be his nurse, keeping the talk strictly business. And for that he did not blame her.

He had heard that her and Knuckles had broken up that very day. The last he also heard was that he had barricaded himself inside the temple of the Master Emerald. He knew that the red male had broken down his walls and plain and simple isolated himself from the real world to live in the one that had been passed down to him by his ancestors.

Once again, shaking his head of his thoughts of either Rouge or Knuckles, Shadow makes his way down the many flights of stairs.

'_Cause I'm one who will survive_

_The ones you eat alive_

_And nobody puts up a fight_

_They die_

_They die_

_Rollin' dollar bills_

_And poppin' all these pills_

_But I'll do what I wanna do_

'_Cause I wasn't built to lose_

Once out of the stair case, Shadow finds himself entering the main floor, leaving the building. He knew from the moment he got out of the tub that he'd be going down memory lane until he stuffed himself full of drugs, crystal methamphetamine sounded like an angel's voice at the moment. Though the sun was rather blinding, Shadow moved forward to find his fix to break the reality.

Again, he allowed memories to flood him.

Silver was apart of the search party as well, as was Blaze. The whole group knew that the fire princess had lost her faith only a month of Sonic's 'death'. however, she kept this quiet, searching besides Silver the entire way. The two worked together, talking to strangers, searching forests, deserts and thick jungles for any sign of the hero that had helped them in the past.

However, even for Silver it was too much.

About month ten Silver was nearly in tears when he confronted the group about his conclusion. He stated that he believed that Sonic was still alive, only the world was slowly returning to chaos, and that Sonic would not want that. So he departed. The sterling hedgehog gave up his search to pick up where Sonic had left off, to help protect the world.

It took Silver nearly three months to work up the nerve to leave his home, which was nothing more than a single apartment that he found though he was rarely ever in. after three long and nerve wrecking months, he had left the comfort of home to travel the world to help protect the planet. Alone.

Blaze wasted no time. Her search for the hero she admired came to an end as well. She too had told the group her feeling of the matter, only hers was more along the lines or Rouge's opinion. She believed that the blue hero was, in fact, dead. Sonic would not just simply disappear and if so, he would have heard the news about his friends misery in the search. And the fact remains that they had searched damn near everywhere they could think of. It was only probable that Sonic the Hedgehog was no more. She had felt horrible about this decission, but it was in her nature to take things and analyze it. And this was what had came out. She was able to move on, and help protect the world with Silver.

However, when she had visited Silver, she had found that he was gone with a note that had told the landlord that he could do whatever he wanted with his stuff and there was a pile of money for the months rent. Though Blaze was irritated, she knew why Silver had done such a foolish act as to running off on his own.

It was to prove himself.

And for that, Blaze had respect for the white creature. She had left the note and the cash, only grabbing a few of Silver's belongings and moving them to her own place, which was a duplex. After moving most of Silver's stuff, she had spoken to her landlord about what she was going to do and they had found a way to make rent work, the landlord knowing that Blaze keeps her word.

Then like Silver had done, Blaze was on her way.

It took a while, but after nearly five months, she had found Silver nearly three countries over. He had roughly an easy time keeping track of money. He had even made a small name for himself along his short journey. However, when alone, Silver still had the habit of being insecure. The lilac feline had kept her distance, not letting the other know that she had following him only to make sure that he was okay.

The fire princess did nothing as she watched Silver let himself being overwhelmed by his negative thoughts. The one she loved more than anything was slowly breaking. Slowly losing his self confidence and gradually deteriorate as a whole. It ripped her heart out but she knew that if Silver needed help, he'd call for her in desperation. Until then, amber eyes silently watch. Waiting until her love calls for her. Needs her.

Distraught, broken down and defeated, Silver had continued his journey. Late one night, he had set up camp. Unfortunately he had to do so in the forest because a storm had came by. Finding shelter under some thick brush, the satin hedgehog waited it out. So in tune with the sounds of nature, he had failed to see that the storm had passed and that there was only a light shower now. During this time he had allowed his thoughts to wonder, triggering his breaking point.

He made the connection that Sonic was in fact, a much better hero then himself. Silver lacked self confidence, self motivation and the instincts to drive him into battle without hesitation. If Sonic _had _been taken down by someone, what chance did he have?

With that simple thought, Silver had broken into tears. For the first time he had let his fatigue show, crying on the forest floor, knees soaked in mud.

From a short distance, Blaze saw this, but did nothing about it. It pained her so much to just watch, but she wasn't needed yet. Ears strain to pick up on any and every sound the other made.

After much crying, Silver found himself lost in himself. He believed he was foolish to go on this journey, and that perhaps he should have asked Blaze to come along. Upon her name, he had accidentally let id slip from his peach muzzle. Screaming her name, Silver had asked both himself and the sky why she wasn't there with him.

Blaze did not hesitate. For the first time in three and a half months, her love had finally called for her help.

After startling the white one with tears, the feline found herself in a tight embrace. After reassuring Silver that he would be okay, the two left the forest to return home, hand in hand.

Jerking his head out of thought, Shadow's crimson eyes widen, loathing the feelings of self pity rushing him as he heads to the other side of town. He knew Blaze and Silver had since returned home. And he also knew what had happened to him. He had grown to like Blaze simply because she wasn't simple or narrow minded like everyone else seemed to be. Blaze thought differently and had a bit of a secret past to her. He respected her thoughts and actions though he could not figure out what she saw in that psychokinetic user of a hedgehog. Last time he had thought about it, he figured it was the same reason he had tried to go after Sonic. And perhaps the same reason Rouge went after Knuckles.

He kept contact with Blaze though they only spoke when one saw the other in public. Last time, the amber eyed cat girl had told him that Silver had proposed to her and that they were to be wedded within the year. The Ultimate Life Form couldn't fight off the smile upon hearing that. She as so excited and happy. After wishing her luck, they parted ways.

Gazing ahead, Shadow allows yet another smile grow on his face if only for a moment. He was glad that someone was enjoying their life seeing as how he could not.

_You keep making the rounds_

_You push me to the ground_

_Making you feel bigger than real_

_But I'm so fucking sick of your face_

_I'm not running a race_

_I'm running away_

_I'm running away_

_While everybody else_

_Is happy on the shelf_

_And I want it messily wrestling_

_Everything down_

_Everything down_

_Down, down_

Admitting defeat, Shadow allowed memory lane to continue as he headed toward town, past the park. He now sort of thought of Tails as a brother. He had known him before Sonic's disappearance. He had about ten years to get to know the two tailed fox and during that time he had learned much.

After Sonic had vanished, Tails was not only eighteen but desperate to find another brother-like relationship. And that's when he had found Shadow. It was obvious that Shadow was different from his counterpart. But he still filled the void and before he knew it, him and Tails were acting like real brothers. Tails story is an odd mixture of sad and happiness. He had started dating Cream at age sixteen. The Ultimate Life Form recalled Sonic mentioning that a long time ago. He had also graduated from high school early and even applied for college, hitting every chance he could get for any technical college that would accept him.

When the blue hero disappeared, it was Tails who set up the search party and it was Tails was most affected by it. Shadow had to give him much credit due to the fact that he was dating Cream, attended college and was taking an online class and still managed to make plenty of inventions that would help aid in finding the missing hero.

Then it all came to a screeching halt.

On month 15, Cream dropped a bombshell on the young male. He was eighteen. She was sixteen. And she was pregnant. Shadow could easily recall the night that Tails found out. Simply by the fact that at about noon, Tails barged into Shadow's apartment having been given a key long ago. The red streaked creature listened for three hours as the twin tailed fox sorted out his thoughts, his emotions, even his future. Cream was keeping the baby, neither wanting to give it up. He would owe up to his responsibility, only he just wasn't so sure of what to do. Vanilla knew, and trusted Tails enough with her baby girl to not turn him over to the police for statutory rape considering the age difference. After a few drinks of what Shadow had offered him, Tails was relaxed enough to think with his heart instead of his head, which was most likely overwhelming him. When he had asked Shadow for help, all the other anthro could say was that it was his decision and that he would help in any way that he could. Calmed, Tails thanked him and left to find Cream.

Within the month, the orange kitsune had lost his love of inventing, having lost that spark that had once brought him happiness. He was so drained of energy from the search and the constant failures that he had allowed himself to stop his passion all together. After cleaning up his house, he had a request for Vanilla. And that was to let Cream(and Cheese obviously)to move in with him. He promised that she would keep attending school and he would take good care of her seeing as how he had plenty of money and was now working as a mechanic. With a tearful yes, Cream had moved in.

With a passing month, Miles had dropped out of all his classes, having been too over worked with school, his girl, the search for his best friend, bills and his soon to be family. He really hated to do it but he knew he was still young and when things calmed down he would pick up on it again. He had consulted Shadow on everything he did, the darker creature just listening and mirroring everything back so that he had little influence in the kit's life.

Tail's keep up the search longer than everyone else, except Amy and Shadow. At about month seventeen, Miles 'Tails' Prower gave up his search for his best friend to help ensure his family had a future. It had nearly killed Shadow to hear that, however, he respected the kit's decission. He had more important things.

During the pregnancy, Tails was a nervous wreck, having no experience in helping out a pregnant female. Though his older friend would do little in helping him, the young fox went to see Shadow, just to update him on how he had been doing.

What he didn't expect to see was Shadow currently injecting himself with crystal meth right into is left arm while surrounded with freshly empty bottles. It took Tails by surprise to see the glassy expression on the stronger male, figure thinned out, fur thick with grease and quills disheveled. It was an awkward conversation, but Tails had succeeded in the conversation where Rouge had failed. He had calmly talked to Shadow like a person and not a child, asking questions about his choice to turn to drugs and why he would do such a thing.

Tails was disappointed and disheartened, but couldn't entirely blame Shadow. It was at that that time that he learned that not only had Shadow had feelings for Sonic, but he had told him about these feelings, and that was just before he had disappeared. He had also learned that Rouge had ended up in the hospital because of him. Tails figured that Shadow did not know about the baby, and he decided that it was probably for the best. Shadow lost much of his dignity that night, and though Tails was disappointed, he lost no respect in Shadow, simply by the fact that he was entirely honest with his thoughts and feelings. Everyone thought that Shadow was the least effected by Sonic's disappearance and simply ignored him during much of the search. Tails now knew that though everyone was affected, Shadow may have been hurt the most, and everyone was blind to the pain, even himself. He had no hard feelings. The younger male left, promising that he would check up on Shadow more often. The Ultimate Life Form had allowed this, needing a form of direction to keep halfway sane.

It was a long nine months for Tails Prower. Cream was actually pretty sensible for being the one with the hormonal unbalance. Vanilla had dropped by on every Sunday to check up on her baby girl, pleased about her treatment and at how happy her daughter was. In no time, it was like Tails was apart of the girl's family.

Cream gave birth to a baby boy. The baby was a rabbit, just like his mother though his coloration was closer to Tails than anything. Crystal blue eyes and a dusty orange pelt similar to Tails was present. Along with the white splashes on his ears and tail. The baby boy also had an white muzzle and a white belly, that stretched up his little chest and edged into tufts like Tails had. He even had the bangs of his hair off the forehead though his where short and more in number.

Tail and Cream decided to call their baby boy Copper.

Tails had one request of Cream that day in the hospital, and that was the favor of letting Shadow be the first person to see their baby. She said yes without hesitation.

And within the hour, Shadow as over, and was looking at the baby boy that his little brother made, with his beautiful mate right next to him, holding the precious creature with the absolute care. To be honest to himself, the raven streaked hedgehog had never actually seen a baby before. So when the call was made, he was a bit resistant. The only reason he had came over was because he was clean at the moment, entirely sober and free of any substance all because of his astounding bioengineered body. He was reluctant to meet the kid, but would not let Tails down, knowing that he was called first. Cream had even offered Shadow to hold the baby, extending her arms slightly as to not other the weight the baby needed. The teen giggled upon seeing the face Shadow gave her, knowing his thoughts on what she had in her arms.

And boy was she not far from the truth.

Shadow gazed at the worm she was offering, bundled in a blue blanket, long, orange ears poking out of the soft blanket. Large, blue eyes gaze up at the dark creature without an ounce of fear but fascination. The white muzzle of the young rabbit was tiny, with large and messy clumps on both cheeks. All the baby could do was wriggle as it made awkward gurgling sounds as new eyes take in it's bright surroundings.

As the mother giggles yet again, Shadow wings it, extending his own arms, heart nearly stopping once the weight of the leveret(I honestly just discovered that that was what a baby rabbit is called)is placed onto his own in full thought that isn't really that much. Blank crimson eyes stare into wide ultramarine ones, which blink wildly as they take in the sight of Shadow the hedgehog.

A smile had crept its way to Shadow's lips as he held the little bundle of nine months in his arms, able to feel the slight wiggle through the blanket. Tails himself had smiled as he witnessed Shadow handle a baby for the first time. It was actually one of the first times in a long time that everyone in that room was happy.

Though the young fox was busy with his new family and his job, he still managed to check up on his friend, Shadow. Though he was heavy in drugs and alcohol, the crimson streaked hedgehog managed to sober up with each visit, able to talk to Tails in full concentration.

He still check up on him, telling the dark one about his domestic life and how school probably won't be an option for a few years yet.

Over all, Tails was happy though he wasn't where he had expected himself to be.

Seven months later, Tails still worked as a mechanic as Cream was a stay at home mom, looking after Copper with the help of Cheese. That mistake he thought he had made was now the most important thing in his life-which is his family. Shadow couldn't help but think that if Sonic could see him now, he would be so proud of the young kit.

Turning down the last street, Shadow let his mind wonder, letting much pain fill him with each passing memory of the past twenty nine months of his life.

_As for I,_

_I'm way to fucking high_

Shadow had allowed his thoughts to waver to those he hardly cared for or knew, but kept note of them because they were in relation so Sonic.

Amy was the first to come to mind no matter how he had fought off the thought. He never like the girl, even before he had feelings for Sonic. She was always so pushy, air headed and obsessed. She was so thoughtless and dimwitted and easily manipulated it wasn't funny. It had bothered Shadow when he had heard that the pink bitch had asked Sonic out and he had said yes. They had been going out for five years. They had been engaged for two. One thing tore them apart.

And was the fact that Amy had asked him to do the impossible. She wanted the one thing that Sonic could not give her, and may possibly never be able to do so. Sonic the Hedgehog was often known as the blue wind. The wind that is pure in heart and can guide any stray being home. He was free and wild, able to go anywhere he pleased and anywhere he needed. The first to be there when a disaster happened or is about to happen. His freedom knew no bound just like the wind.

And Amy Rose wanted to contain that free spirited wind.

She had asked him to stay home, quite being a hero and get a job. Quite being a hero so she no longer had to worry about him never returning home one night. She wanted to start a family, with him having a job to support both her and their family. She wanted Sonic to stop his travels and hang up the towel in his current life.

She got her wish.

He hung up the towel.

On her.

He was hurt to hear all that Amy wanted, and knew for sure that he would never be able to give her what she truly desired. He loved her. He also knew that if the pink hedgehog had loved him like she said she did, she never would have asked for him to do such a thing.

Then, within the next month, Sonic goes missing.

At first, Amy blamed herself. She strongly believed that she was the cause of Sonic's sudden disappearance, purely because he did not want to be by her. And all because she made the mistake of asking Sonic to stop doing what made him him. Amy knew she made the mistake. She knew that she was to blame. She knew a lot of things. But then she really hadn't seen him around for, and Sonic would have returned to apologize and with hope, make things better for the two of them. Only after a while it became something different. An eerie feeling fell upon her and she confronted Tails about it. He had felt the same thing. And so, the search began.

Amy searched high and low, never getting discouraged even when their team began to brake away. She held strong. Even when the search party was reduced to Shadow, Tails and herself. She was sickened by the fact that Shadow was still around but took the help anyway, wanting to find Sonic more than anyone. She had caused a few awkward moments though. Accusing Shadow of a few things, like not caring about Sonic and just helping out to humor her. She had even accused him of withholding information on Sonic's possible whereabouts. Each accusation fell on deaf ears however.

When Tails announced that he too was giving up his search for Cream and his future, Amy lost her dying fire. Later that exact same day, she too had given up hope and abandoned her participation in Sonic the Hedgehog's search party.

A few months had passed on and when no one had heard from her, Rouge had stopped by to see what had happened to the poor thing as well as tell her the news about her pregnancy. Upon entering the girl's house, the bat girl had a feeling that something was wrong. The air was too quiet and full of a cold presence. Searching the house like her gut feeling told her to, teal eyes had finally picked up the fragile pink body of Amy Rose on the floor of her room.

For days, Amy saw nothing but a black abyss, unable to move or even think.

The girl woke up in the hospital, with Cream and Rouge by her side. The girl had tried to commit suicide. Luckily, Rouge had gotten to her just in time and the many drugs the distraught hedgehog had swallowed had been safely removed before they could take full effect. The girl quickly found herself on many anti-depressants and much consoling as much as constant check up on friends.

Shadow had absolutely no feelings on this. Even to this day. He never cared for the pink one before and thought that her attempt was simply trying to taking the easy way out. He suffered every single day and she was trying to just end her life to end her pain. Shadow had no pity on the girl.

The Babylon Rouges had amused Shadow actually. They had wanted Sonic back in good sport. They joined the search on day two, having to have the night to travel after hearing about it on the news. Shadow had meet them before, when he was in an undercover mission that had to deal with some illegal smuggling in a virus type of microchip. He had learned plenty about air riding and how to work a board. He himself actually got the chance to met the group of birds though at the time they were suspects. It wasn't a fun day for any of them.

Jet, Wave and Storm had all volunteered to help. Though Storm had done nothing but remind the Ultimate Life Form of Knuckles though he was very loyal to the green hawk with the habit of being a total asshole, Jet made a rather poor impression, being bossy and short tempered. Wave on the other hand was different, being surprisingly smart though mostly in mechanics, she also had common sense on her side, the girl basically being Jet's conscience.

The trio had quite an advantage, being able to stay up long hours without it having an effect on their persons, that being making them cranky and more irritable than everyone already was. They also had the advantage of going far distances rather quickly, moving swiftly on boards, stopping only for rest and repairs. Tails had given everyone who offered help a type of communication, usually in the form of headphones and a microphone that could be tuned and search for a signal. If the fox had the time, he would have made something better but these things were just quick fixes so that he didn't have to waste searching time on things that would most likely be used only once.

Searching thoroughly for a little short of six months, the Babylon Rouges suddenly couldn't take it anymore. The failure, the pressure, lack of real rest, and getting on each others nerves like no body's business. Storm's clumsiness was getting on everyone's nerves. With the less sleep he got, the more awkward him movements were. He always suffered from cramps, having to stay still for so long while still going at such high speeds. His apatite didn't help the group much either. There were times he was so exhausted that the large silver bird had just passed out, and sometimes for days. Wave was always there to help her friend out though Jet was just angry that they were slacking off.

Then the fights started.

Wave and Jet had done nothing but argue while Storm was out. And they fought over everything. Money, time, rest, Storm, Sonic, mechanics, even the weather. It seemed that the more the two spent time together, the more they couldn't stand each other. There was temporary relief once, when the hawk had to much anger and fury that he had just jumped on his board and took off, knowing that he'd have to come back because it was only Wave he trusted with his board.

By the end of that day, he needed her more than ever. Not only was he so blinded with rage-both at his team and himself, he was also blinded by the sun, careless enough to not have put on his shaded goggles. And that cost him his board. That wasn't all either. Within seconds, the prideful leader was on the muddy earth, sporting gashes on his chest, left arm, and left hip. Stunned, all the feathered creature could do was lay still as the pain had swelled hard and fast, the dirt pooling with his blood. All the prideful creature could do was lay there as the life was leaving him. Light blue eyes caught sight of a treasured board, nothing but priceless scrap now. All because he had to mess up, press on without thinking. Somehow, Jet had managed to get to his feet, grab his board and stagger his way to a nearby water source. That day it seemed that Jet was not affected by the blood escaping his body, but rather his pride instead. He had failed. In finding Sonic. In being a good leader. In being a good friend. And in keeping himself safe.

When the search began, the avian rouge had asked his periwinkle friend to modify their gear so that it was not just for speed but also useful. So little trunk-like pockets had been added. Luckily, Jet had a type of first aid kit. It pained him do so, but within moments of arriving at the pond he had found, bloodstained feathers littered the ground and pond surface, some of them containing his flesh from his hasty yanking. Tears had swelled in blue eyes as the evening air stung at the open wound. Jet couldn't believe he was so stupid. Never before had he been so injured, and he knew that this would scar. All he could do was hope that his feathers would grow back enough to hide scar as he poured alcohol on this gashes, a muffled scream escaping his beak. As the sun set, the young hawk of only twenty four threaded a type of needle, ready to start the most agonizing moments of his life.

Hours had passed, the silver albatross had yet to wake. The bird with lilac feathers paces the campground that was only temporary. She knew that things were said and that Jet was pissed, but she knew that he would have been back before dark. She began to worry.

All the worry was cut short when the girl heard footsteps behind her. The worry disappeared only to be replenished by anger. Another argument started, this time about Jet's mistake to just run off, his wounds, his stupidity, and his board. They didn't have the money or parts to make a new board or even repair the one that was busted clean in half. Wave knew what kind of wounds were underneath those bloodied bandages, which had been wrapped tightly around a green arm, chest, hip and upper leg. She also knew that with the board broken the way it was, that Jet had been going pretty fast to do such a thing though not too fast or else she'd still be waiting for his return. She knew it'd scar pretty bad as well.

The two birds were frustrated, and throughout their entire argument, Storm laid asleep, a few yards away. Wave and Jet called on everything in the past. Wave called back the times of Jet's high school years-all the trouble he caused, all the damage he did, all the friends he made and lost, all the girls he tossed aside, not to mention the horrible relationship he had with his parents who had claimed they had no son. The forest green bird retaliated by shoving Wave's past in her face as well. About how she had no friends growing up, how she was teased about her looks and lack of fashion and how her mother was a drunk and she had no clue who her father even was.

The swallow knew her friend had a temper. Knew he could lose it very easily, despite his pride to never let is show. For the first time, she had also lost hers. Wave shouted, screamed and disrespected her friend in any manner she could come up with during the heated argument. Then Jet did something he had never done before.

He hit her.

Wave had hit the earth with a loud thump, a squeak escaping her as she landed. Dumbfounded, the girl stayed on her back for a moment before sitting up, rubbing the side of her face by her beak, Jet having hit the soft part of her had as to not hurt himself with the hard material of the beak. A bruise was sure to appear in a few hours. Crystal blue eyes meet powder blue as both register what had just happened. Jet's eyes widen, mortification filling his face as it dawned on him.

Before anyone could speak, Jet turned his back to the shocked girl, walking away. He had never done such a thing before. And he refused to do it again.

By the time Storm woke up, his leader was long gone, and Wave was upset. He was told that Jet was not coming back. This was verified by the broken board that his boss had left behind in the dirt, Wave having not touched it since it was thrown there. They left, parting ways. Quitting their search for Sonic at only month eleven.

The Babylon Rouges had their fall out.

And with in a few months, Wave found herself a pretty decent life. Living in a small apartment, making a few friends and working as a mechanic as she attends college so she can open up her own business. Everything was going great.

Until she became sick that was. For some reason, she could not figure out why she was feeling so sick. She'd spontaneously vomit, and that was about it. She just couldn't figure it out, so eventually she went to the hospital, thinking that she might have eaten something she shouldn't have eaten. Hearing about what had really happened definitely made her ill.

The young female was pregnant with Jet's baby. She had been so busy with her new friends, her job, her hobby and school work-and beforehand, searching for a missing blue hero-she failed to pay enough attention to notice that she had missed her period. Wave suddenly felt her whole world crashing down.

Though she had feelings for Jet, they never officially made a relationship. What they really had was more like friends with benefits if anything.

Alone, Wave decided to call up Storm, who she had recently found out had been living near the sea, becoming fast friends with a purple cat by the name of Big who like to fish nearby. Though Wave had not wanted to, the seabird had talked his friend about locating Jet and telling him. She knew that he should at least know that he had a kid on the way. Only she could not do such a thing. The purple bird had told her good friend that Jet had hit her, and though it was her fault and that he was angry, she still was hurt that he just left like he had though she knew why. Storm understood.

He understood too well. And he had just the thing to help out his friend.

Before long, Wave the swallow was what women would call themselves 'fat', being six months along. The girl quit attending college to take on line classes and her condition left her useless movement wise so she was assigned desk duty until she was able to work again. The headstrong girl was scared. She knew a lot about mechanics and things of that nature and had common sense on her side, but when it came to babies, she didn't have a clue. She wasn't even sure she had the mother instinct in her and just hoped that it would kick in when she brings home that baby.

One day she got the surprise of her life.

There was a knock on her door, and when she answered it she found Jet the Hawk on her doorstep. The moments were awkward, especially because Jet knew about the kid because of Storm. He was also how the green bird knew where Wave lived.

The male owed up to everything. He apologized for hitting the girl, knowing he never should have even considered it. He apologized for running off and abandoning his ground, and the hurtful things he had said and thought. Wave offered her own apology about the things that she had said.

The bandages were off of Jet, his feathers having grown it pretty well though they have yet to grow in entirely and cover the marred skin. Wave had learned that Jet had literally done nothing with his time. He had served some time for a few bar fights and now sported fresh charges for assault and drug possession. Before long, the two were talking about the baby and Wave's live now that it was what people call domestic.

When it was getting late, Wave told her friend that she needed to head to bed but only after he got a gift. Though it had confused the green one, he quickly understood. When Wave returned, she had green and white board in her hands, extending them out to her previous boss. She had fixed Jet's air board to perfection, a new finish and even paintjob glistening with grace and beauty.

Though Wave did not know it, Jet had a decission to make.

Without hesitation, the young hawk grabbed the board, setting it aside onto the floor with a loud clatter. Confused, light blue eyes flick from the metal board to the male. It took a moment for her to understand. Everything would be alright.

Jet the Hawk, leader of the Babylon Rouges, had hung up his board. Not because of lack of competition like he had thought he would do long ago, but because he had more important things. He had a family to take care of.

Stepping on a can, Shadow the Hedgehog is snapped out of his thoughts, forced to top for the moment to kick of the stupid thing. He was almost to his location, meaning memory lane was almost done and over with. He was quite thankful. Tails had mentioned the Babylon Rouges a while ago, Wave being pregnant and Jet owing up to his actions and taking care of her. Storm was quite happy with his new life as a fisherman, having learned quite a lot from his newest friend Big and Froggy. Shadow really didn't care about them, but did make a mental note to wish the girl good luck.

Stomping along the streets, Shadow continued his venture to find something to kill his mind for a while, unable to fight off yet another unneeded trip.

Team Chaotix volunteered to help. Never once did they mention the word pay though it was made clear that they were in need of money. Charmy was his usual annoying self, bringing the group good faith and humor though it did nothing but punch at Shadow's nerves. But just like with every one else there, he put up with him. Of course Rouge telling him that he could not hit, maim, or harm Charmy and Cheese might have a big part in it. Shadow didn't mind Espio, he knew how to take care of himself though he did have that habit of appearing out of no where that even startled the Ultimate Life Form.

Vector did his usual thing, screaming at the little bee and making a fool of himself. He did help a bit, asking around and using many resources to seek out any information though that one was mostly Espio. The chameleon had caused more than enough drama that ended their search early however. It wasn't hidden that Espio had an intimate relationship with Vector due to the many lewd remarks the green crocodile had made. Though Espio hated it, he let his boyfriend do whatever as he continued to work, like he usually did.

Mighty the armadillo had heard about the hero's disappearance and though he disagreed with fighting, he knew that Sonic had done a lot of good. So he traveled quite a distance to help. By the time he got there, Sonic was already declared dead but he decided to help out anyway having already traveled the distance. Meeting up with Team Chaotix was to no surprise. Seeing Espio with Vector was however.

As the four worked together to figure out a plan, Espio did something he regretted.

Working with someone like Mighty was refreshing. The armadillo pulled his own weight, keeping focused on the task in front of him like the magenta chameleon had wished a certain green crocodile did. One night, on a dead end, the two went out to loosen up. Getting only a bit tipsy, both being the responsible adults they were, the two headed to HQ to find Charmy with Cream and Tails and Vector out with Amy since he was alone. One thing lead to another and before Espio had knew it, he was in bed with his old rival, both of them shamelessly touching the other without a care in the world.

By the time that Mighty had woken up, Espio was already at work, Vector right next to him and Charmy singing as the other two worked. He knew the chameleon wasn't his. So he left it be, working like nothing happened.

Though what happened once had happened again.

And what shouldn't have happened at all happened more and more.

Eventually Vector caught on, accusing Espio of cheating on him with Mighty right in front of Sonic's rescue crew. On the spot, the chameleon did the right thing, admitting to it. However honest the ninja was and forgiving Vector turned out to be, the two kept sleeping together. One day, Vector had given his cheating boyfriend a choice, and it was to choose who he wanted once and for all.

Mighty was chosen.

And everything went to hell after that.

Vector dropped out of both the search and Team Chaotix, disappearing himself. Charmy had left to join different detective agency while Espio and Mighty moved in together, mapping different search patterns and areas to find a location of help instead of Sonic himself. Month nine, Team Chaotix had broken up after thirteen years of working together.

A few months later, they discovered what happened to Vector. The crocodile had allowed his pride and dignity to fall, only to become a drunk. And a nasty one with a temper at that. While Mighty was out on a faint trail, Espio had stayed home, making phone calls to a few local businesses who's means didn't add up like they should have. That's when Vector had broken down the door, displaying his sheer strength-the first thing that his ex-lover had fallen for in the first place. The chameleon could smell the alcohol on the crocodile's breath, and had tried to escape. However, Vector was surprisingly fast and with one miscalculation, Espio was in the hands of his previous boss/friend. All it took was one slight error and the ninja was caught in the hand of his friend.

So desperately did he want to get out of that grasp, but each thought would have brought pain to Vector, and though he had cheated on him, he never meant to hurt him. Espio still cared for him. The shear hatred that shone in those golden eyes had done nothing but startle the chameleon. It had actually stunned him to the point were escape was not even an active thought much less an option.

Even as Vector began to beat him in rage, shouting anything he could think of regarding the rotten chameleon in his hands. The drunken beast called him many things that an angry man would call a woman who had wronged him. Espio listened as his ex-lover called him a cum dumpster, a slut, and even a whore. He listened as the one that was so kind to him months ago battered his body, saying that he was useless and worthless, and that Mighty doesn't know what kind of a whore he had picked up. Said things that should never have been said and with such a snarl of pure venom as well. Espio didn't know what hit him.

By the time Mighty got home, he was breathing with a rasp, unable to communicate without gasping. The armadillo wasted no time in getting his new lover to the hospital. When questioned, all Espio had said was that someone had jumped him, probably some guy against gays. The police asked no further questions, calling it a day. Though Mighty knew exactly who it was that had beaten his boyfriend, he never once questioned Espio, knowing that he knew he knew.

By the time the detective left the hospital, he had a broken collar bone, a busted arm and wrist, problems with his right eye, three teeth were removed, two ribs had to be repaired, surgery had been done on his leg to fix some nerve tissue that had been damaged, and the horn on his head had been removed due to an infection though it would just grow back soon. The search for Sonic had been delayed.

As for Dr. Ivo Eggman, well, he had almost taken over a few large cities to make his Eggman Empire, however, when it became that not even mass destruction would call out the hero, the brilliant man just gave up. There was no sport in taking over the world when there was no one to stop you. Though his inventions appear from time to time, the doctor really just vanished, similar to Sonic. Hell, Eggman was even caught searching for the blue hedgehog himself.

'_Cause I'm one who will survive_

_The ones you eat alive_

_And nobody puts up a fight_

_They die_

_They die_

_Rollin' dollar bills_

_And poppin' all these pills_

_But I'll do what I wanna do_

'_Cause I wasn't built to lose_

"'ey" A familiar voice snaps Shadow out of his thoughts. "Ya must really needa fix" Turning around to face the voice, the raven hedgehog realizes that he had walked passed who he had set out to see.

"Very much so." Shadow responds, stepping over to the green hedgehog in the ally.

"Ah," he knew that look. "Mem'ry lane I'ma guessin'?"

"Of course. What do you have today Scourge and please tell me it's something strong." Pulling out the cash in his sock. "Today has been one of the longest days of my god damn life." Crimson eyes watch as a dirty glove reaches into a leather coat, pulling out a few colored vials.

There were seven of them. Three of them yellow, two of them blue, one clear and one black. "Well, I've been thinkin' 'bout yer problem wit these neva werkin' fer ya so I modified my recipe to make it stronger." Scourge explains, tossing Shadow the vial with the black liquid. "I'm just not too sure how much stronger seein' as how the one's I make fer ya are too strong fer anyone else to take without dyin' er endin' up in a coma" is explained in a distracted manner as Scourge sets the other containers of his different brews of crystal meth into his pocket.

Wasting no time, Shadow asks "how much?" Red eyes examine the vial in his bare hands, fur sliding over the smooth texture of glass. Scourge made the drugs he makes himself, each different color having a different kick to it for different effects. He's had to make three different designs just for Shadow since he is the Ultimate Life Form, the man only upping his price once. Shadow didn't mind. At first it was business, but after nearly two years of seeing the man, they had formed an off type of friendship, mostly drug related. In fact, the red streaked hedgehog can call a few times where he had spent a few nights at Scourge's apartment. Also remembers meeting the man's boyfriend, Mephiles a few times. Then he learned that his so called 'shadow' had a strong dislike for Scourge on drugs simply because the green rat will not live forever and the fallen god did not want his lover to be killed or numbed by the effects of mind altering substances.

"Hm?" Scourge scratches his head for a moment before making the connection. "Oh, same price. You always only ever carry the exact amount on ya and it's not like I'll take advantage of a friend any how. Ain't got many ta spare, ya know?" With a chuckle, Scourge swipes that cash that Shadow had in hand. "Besides, I like ya."

With an out of place grin, Shadow tosses the vial from hand to hand in a lazy fashion. "How is Mephiles anyhow?" He asks, half interested. It seemed with the disappearance of Sonic and his lack of good choices, somehow Shadow had gotten close to the drug dealer Scourge and the assassin Mephiles. It came to the point where he really didn't care so long as he wasn't alone. It didn't matter if the company had a bad history or if they were as pure as Tails.

"Mephiles? Oh, he's on me about quitin' the whole drug thing and stayin a hooker." The green hedgehog sits on a crate, pulling out a cigarette, casting what someone could call his boyfriend's twin brother. "I donno…wouldn't a jealous bastard like 'im wanna keep me to himself and make some good money wit the damn drugs" he chuckles.

With a shrug, the older hedgehog lets his softer side kick in. "I suppose so, however, I know why he wishes you to stop considering your people skills are rather poor and you could not hold a job for more than a day. Not to mention you have this persistent habit of irritating the wrong people."

"Ooo, ouch." Scourge sniggers, letting a grin show on his face.

"Talking about me when I am not around once again I see Scourge."

Hearing a third voice, Scourge and Shadow turn their heads to see the topic of their conversation.

"And I also see that you are selling yet again even though I have told you not to time and time again." Crimson eyes gaze over the appearance of his doppelganger. Gray gloves were covered in dirt and dust, blood still went on his pelt. "Good evening Shadow. I have not heard from you in quite a while."

"Been busy." Was Mephiles' only answer.

Slitted green eyes move over the disheveled appearance of what was suppose to be the Ultimate Life Form, a weapon of mass destruction. Tired eyes that were bloodshot, dried blood on one hand, no gloves though that seemed to be the newer look of the young creature, with a black vile in one hand. "I can very much see this." The green eyed hedgehog glances over at the green fuzz ball, not all impressed. "Scourge, go home. We need to talk."

Teal eyes light up. "What? 'ey I-"

"Go"

Shrinking at the stern voice in his direction, the younger rodent jumps off the crate, shuffling his feet, knowing what it is that Mephiles wanted to talk about. "Okay okay. Geeze."

Once the green pest is out of sight, Mephiles gets to business. "I over heard two detectives speaking to one another the other day." The gray streaked hedgehog begins.

"And?" Shadow didn't quite know what this had to do with him really.

"An armadillo and a chameleon," the conversation is continued. "Know them?"

It clicked after a moment. "Mighty and Espio." He hadn't heard from or about them in quite a while. Not since Espio had been put in the hospital. All he knew was that Team Chaotix was done and over with. "what about them?"

"Well.." rather amused by the obliviousness the Ultimate Life Form was displaying, Mephiles continues speaking. As amused as he was, he wanted to go home and talk to his idiot of a lover. "The two are now duo detective, and they are picking up on a case they had given up long ago."

Losing his patience, Shadow sneers, narrowing his eyes. "What is your point Mephiles?"

Sauntering closer, green eyes seem to pierce into Shadow's whole being. "That case is Sonic's sudden disappearance." A cruel grin finds it's way onto Mephiles' muzzle as crimson eyes shrink in a sort of fear. "You remember who that is, do you not?" is asked through a slight coo.

"They are foolish. He is dead." To be honest, that was the first time Shadow had said that, or even thought it. With a few more steps, Mephiles is right next to Shadow, same height though he too was immortal and as such was unable to age. Impressed with the way Shadow had looked, he commented on it and the Ultimate Life Form had offered the same treatment, and so, asking for a favor of Tails, he was also morphed to prevent such awkward moments in the future. Fierce eyes looking past the world without a care in the world as he waited for the other's reaction to the information provided. He didn't have to wait too long. Feeling the sudden chill, hands suddenly opening in shear shock, bottle of crystal methamphetamine he had just purchased. The vial shatters against the cracked concrete, liquid black pooling out of the confides of what use to be it's container, sound and containments go totally unnoticed in this action. Shadow truly hesitated. "…isn't he?" was barely ghosted out.

Black ears pick up on a low rasp, the voice of his look alike. "Basement floor number seven, wing four of the new company that goes by Nega Sol Gear Corporation. Security is extraordinarily high for such a small company, however, they have big plans."

Shadow registered what was said and what it meant.

"How do you know this?"

"I over heard the two detectives last week." Mephiles explains slowly, keeping his attention on the street before him. "They had a haunch however, they could not get in very easily. Espio searched inside using his invisibility however, found nothing."

Shadow was a tad confused on how Mephiles knew exactly where Sonic was to be located. "How do you know so much when Mighty and Espio have failed?"

"I was hired to rid of a few problems by Dr. Nega Eggman himself. A few scientists were failing and new too much." The cold voice of the fallen god continues. "Having knowledge of the possible location of Sonic before hand and the reason as to why Nega wanted the worthless trash gone," there is a slight pause. "I took it upon myself to get information out of them before ending their pathetic lives."

Another question brought curiosity to Shadow. "Why are you telling me this?" Last he checked, they were not entirely on good terms. Not only had he locked him in a scepter, but tried to end his existence though he failed, only managing to stunt his ability to travel through time. Then there was the whole things with Scourge and drugs that Mephiles can't seem to stand. It didn't add up.

For a short while, there was an awkward pause before Mephiles sought his answer. "Because if Scourge were to go missing…no on would care. I know this. I…I want to be able to go to at least one person for help." Dark lids close, admitting something to Shadow before himself. "I could not bare to lose him…I love him."

Shadow knew exactly how that feels. To love someone and to suddenly have them taken away. He didn't know what he would have done if no one had bothered to look for Sonic. He would have lost it completely. "I understand." Is spoken with care, nodding slightly. "Go to him then." With that, Shadow makes his way to the building that would soon be nothing but rubble.

"Oh, and Shadow," is called out just loud enough for Shadow to hear. Crimson eyes gaze back to see that Mephiles was walking away, facing away from him in doing so. "Good luck."

_There has gotta be more_

_There has gotta be more_

_There has gotta be more_

_There has gotta be more_

Within twenty minutes, Shadow finds himself standing in front of the building. With bold metallic print, the letters 'Nega Sol Gear Cooperation' was actually quite subtle. The building itself was quite normal, just a plain off-white. The company building itself wasn't too big either, normal if a bit small. Shadow was positive that there was much more than meets they eyes however. Trusting Mephiles in full, the Ultimate Life Form walks in, passing the desk woman, who had been too busy to even notice. He had managed to find the stairs, knowing full well that there would be no elevator to the lower levels. After passing a few workers who had probably thought Shadow was Mephiles, who they had seen walking with their boss just last week, Shadow finally found the door he was looking for, opening the door to see many metallic flights of stairs. With a small curse with the idea of walking down more stairs, Shadow makes his way down them, taking the easy way of grinding down the middle rail, which turned to stay the middle rail for the next flight of stairs.

With little thoughts of what he would find, Shadow keeps going his pace, downward until he reaches floor eight. Without bothering to check the floor number in his absent mind, Shadow enters, wondering into the one roomed floor. Looking around, ruby eyes flick upward to see a large computer core, glowing in neon shades of yellow as power lights up in bursts, traveling through the many conduits and tightly wrapped wire that still illuminates. A large computer screen with something similar to Eggman's logo blinking on screen. Something was wrong. Before Shadow could ask questions-or hide for that matter-people were shouting at him. Screaming 'get him' and 'don't let him escape'. Kicking into gear, Shadow leaps into the air, scanning the room for how many people were present in the room. With less then ten, Shadow gets to business.

Showing that a mere year of not using his strengths were not enough to slow him down, Shadow sends off an energy, knocking everyone down and causing the computer core to spark slightly. Anger in being delayed to see Sonic after so long, Shadow goes on the attack, not caring if anyone is killed. Sending one chaos spear after another, Shadow immobilizes each human, leaving them knocked out or dead. Turning face to the core, Shadow decides to not let the thing take affect with whatever program it had been designed for to kick in. with a few kicks to the screen, a few punches to the drive below and removal of cords and wires, the machine was wildly sparking, smoke pouring out of the metal scrap.

Wasting no more time, Shadow takes off upstairs, picking up on the seventh floor he had so carelessly missed. Dashing forward, his hover skates working for the first time in ever, the raven hedgehog picks up speed. With red lights flashing off corner walls, Shadow realizes that his time is limited due to the fact that what was going off was a dangerous mixture of the fire alarm and the security alert going off. Nega knew he was here, and knew that he was after Sonic.

Just as the lights had flashed on, the sound of the fire alarm loud as can be in the echoing hall, and slots were sliding from the walls. Guns. Just as Shadow could make sense of what type of gun it was, he was forced to jump, now having to race against time and avoid being shot at. Free of having to avoid workers because of the fire alarm, all the Ultimate Life Form has to do now is avoid being injured. Within moments, crimson eyes pick up on a large door labeled one. Racing to the next door, Shadow couldn't help but wonder how large this place was and how this Nega guy could afford such things on a small company. Then again, he also couldn't help but wonder if he had a tie to Ivo himself. After what seemed like forever, Shadow the Hedgehog finally reached door number four. All that was behind him was ruins of machines and unfortunately, a few people that had bothered to stop him.

Assessing his surroundings, Shadow leaps forward to the large locks and attempts to bust through them by kicking. After failing and causing a lot of ruckus, the distraught hedgehog tries a new tactic. Attacking the door directly. With a few hard blows, the door breaks, tipping forward though still partially connected by the hinges.

A sound was heard that not only could break someone's soul but forced the world to stop turning, even if it was only to Shadow. The noise was quiet but spoke so much in volume.

"H-hey Shads…long time no see, 'eh?"

'_Cause I'm one who will survive_

_The ones you eat alive_

_And nobody puts up a fight_

_They die_

_They die_

_Rollin' dollar bills_

_And poppin' all these pills_

_But I'll do what I wanna do_

'_Cause I wasn't built to lose_

His breathing stopped short, the air being squeezed out of his lungs at what he had saw. He saw Sonic the Hedgehog. Sonic the Hedgehog was standing before him. Or rather, locked before him. Inside of a cage that limited any kind of movement stood Sonic the Hedgehog. The missing hero. They stared into each other's eyes, Dead red into pale green, both in shock. Sonic thought no on would ever find him. Shadow thought he would never see the one he loved again.

Punching his way through what he guessed was the weakest part of the containment unit, Shadow pulls Sonic out of the small box, neither one moving as they stare at one another. Taking in what was before them.

Though the once royal blue pelt was pale now, it was still perfectly groomed, slicked back in it's trademark spike form. He seemed beat though so full of energy, as if he hadn't ran in so long. Realizing the situation, Shadow shivered at the thought that Sonic hadn't ran in over two years. He seemed a bit thicker, which was to be expected with little exercise. Luckily the hero had a high metabolism.

The hero couldn't help but smile despite the appearance that Shadow had picked up. One that didn't look like him at all. Disheveled fur tossed every which way, once spiked head quills styled upwards were now down, almost like his own, the solid line of what were red streaks now a wild mess. Blood red eyes that use to burn with such a fierce fire now snuffed out, left for dead. His eyes were bloodshot and glazed over. The white fur on his chest was everywhere and even knotted in a few places. The male's hands were bare of gloves, two ring inhibitors resting on each wrist. Dried blood could be picked up by green eyes as well.

A swelling feeling absorbed Shadow as he did nothing but gaze at the hero. It was powerful and it felt as if it were trying to kill the raven furred creature right then and there. The feeling was fierce and was determined to crush him as he tried to deal with one cold hard fact. Sonic was alive. After twenty nine months, Sonic was standing before him, in the flesh. And Shadow didn't know how to feel or react. Even as Sonic gave a weak smile at the situation, the feeling did nothing but grow to intensifying waves.

Sonic was back. Everyone had broken apart. Everyone thought he was dead. Believed he was dead. Gave up hope. Gave up faith. And in the process, lost themselves. Everyone became a different and better person. Everyone became a victim.

Everyone.

Tails had given up everything that Sonic had encouraged him to do since he was really young. The young kit had given up his passion for inventing and mechanics for the girl he had accidentally knocked up. Cream is still in high school, with a seven month old to care for as Tails works two jobs to support his family.

While Silver tried to be a hero, he failed. he had broken, needing Blaze to help him through his life. The two were to be wedded.

Amy had tried to kill herself, spent a good amount of time in special treatment with others like herself only to be released on some serious anti-depressants and more than enough therapy.

Eggman quite simply because there was no fun in the sport in making the Eggman Empire without someone to make the effort worth his time and effort.

Team Chaotix had a bad fall out. Though Charmy had found himself a new home, Espio and Vector had a bad fight, leaving the crocodile to become a drunk while the other fell for another man, Mighty. Espio was beaten so bad by the on he use to love so bad that he is left blind in one eye and has lost feeling in one of his arms. Him and Mighty have their own successful detective names while Vector just went away, in and out of jail.

The Babylon Rouges had all hung up their boards as well. After making a total ass of himself, Jet abandoned his group, not only damaging some nerve tissue in the left side of his body but leaving Wave pregnant as well. After some meddling from Storm, the two are now living together with their year old baby girl, Flow. As for Storm, he had not only taken up fishing, but started a relationship with Big.*

Knuckles and Rouge broke up, after being engaged after five years of dating. Rouge heart broken about Knuckles leaving her and losing her baby. Knuckles had locked himself in a temple, actually leaving the Master Emerald unattended in doing so.

Everyone was different, Sonic would probably not recognize anyone anymore.

Including himself. While almost everyone else had fallen and gotten back up on their own two feet, Shadow was still falling. He had never given up, searching countless days while he stood there and watched everyone else fight, bicker, lose their hope and eventually abandon the search in despair. Shadow fell to drugs to drown out his suffering. Shadow had turned to alcohol to numb his body and mind. There was nothing he could do.

And now, after the longest twenty nine months of his life, Sonic was _right _in front to him.

It did nothing but piss Shadow the fuck off.

While Sonic was gone, though he was imprisoned, Shadow was nothing short of absolutely _helpless_. Useless. Sonic left Tails and himself to watch everyone else die from the inside, drain themselves until there was nothing else left. It was _him _who had continued to take care of Tails when he needed Sonic the most. It was _him _who was the only on who held on as long as he could, even long after there was nothing left to hang on to, being forced to fall and try to climb his way back up to grasp onto nothing but hope. It was _him _who suffered most. It was _him _who fell the hardest. It was _him _who failed. It was _him _who broke, shattering into so many pieces that he never bothered to pick up the pieces as everyone else stepped on the fragments only to get hurt in the process. He had _hurt _so many, including his best friend.

All of this agony, suffering and hatred had overwhelmed what was suppose to be joy for seeing the cobalt hero after so long, angering the hedgehog. The lack of drugs in his system had allowed all this pain to fill him completely as a whole, all the feelings and guilt that Shadow had been running from for so long just hit him.

And he didn't know how to control it.

He failed in fact.

Within moments, Shadow had the other pinned to the wall, the alarms still going off. A surprised shout had escaped the hero as the force nearly knocked the wind right out of him. Before Sonic could grasp onto a damn thing, Shadow was shouting.

"You fucking hedgehog!" The venom was of pure hate, eyes filling with a hardness to match despite the glazed appearance. Sonic was scared, but he did not fear for his life. "Do you have any fucking idea how it's been without you!" Sonic knew what this was about, he realized he should have seen this coming. "I've seen your friends do things I never should have seen happen to them! I've seen so much-and heard so much-and then…I…" Tears swelled in his eyes as the anger melted to frustration. "You've been gone for more than two fucking years! Two years Sonic!" Hearing his name, the blue hero made no attempt to voice anything. "I've done so much…so much that is unforgivable…I am ashamed…" The image of Rouge laying on the floor came to mind. Laying on her side, blood on her fragile body despite what she says. That was the last time he saw her. His best friend.

Rage flares once again.

"Everyone was dead on the inside and I had to watch it!" With a flick of his wrist, Sonic was sent flying across the flashing red air, landing with a harsh thud only to slide. "I slowly died myself!" Shadow stalked the hero, moving closer like a predator hunting it's pray. "Because of you I slowly killed myself!" Admitting this, Shadow lost it. Eyes turning red, the soft glow humming around him as he struggled with so much in his thoughts, memories and feelings. They were flashing behind his eyes so fast that he couldn't understand them, they were moving so fast and there were so many broken words and thoughts that they would never be able to be sifted through. There was too much noise. Shadow lost it, fear evident in his own ruby eyes as Sonic looks up in horror, green eyes shrinking at the realization of what was happening to Shadow. What _he _had done to Shadow. "You _destroyed _me!" With those crystal tears, Shadow the only thing he could do while in this state of mind.

He beat Sonic.

_Now break this fucking place, go_

_I'm so sick of your face_

_I'm not running a race_

_I'm running away_

_I'm running away, away_

_I'm so sick of your face_

_I'm not running a race_

_I'm running away_

_I'm running away, away_

Shadow the Hedgehog walks out of the bathroom, having to rub some burn cream on his left arm. He had also applied some on his shoulder, side, hip and thigh just moments ago. He wouldn't have to put up with the cream for much longer. The drugs hadn't slowed his healing system down, but the suddenly stopping did. Guess it could only focus on one thing at a time, the drugs probably had damaged his body and rendered it a bit slow to respond to healing. He had a feeling that was only temporary, his body's way of needing a fix to the drugs that he had pumped into his system for so long and at such high doses. With a sigh, Shadow recalls what had all happened, now able to fully deal with the emotions that came with them.

Nothing had happened in the past three weeks. No one had dropped by to see him, and it was probably for the best. Placing the small tube into the broken medicine cabinet, the shamed hedgehog staggers into his room. Bare feet shuffle through carpet, a soft smile appearing for the first time in so long. He thought that the time spent apart from Sonic was so long, he was wrong. It had been roughly three weeks, and Sonic was no longer missing, though that information was only to Shadow and Tails, and in a way, Mephiles. They kept it between them, not even Cream knew.

Now standing in front of his dresser, Shadow pulled out his top drawer, eyeing the empty syringes and the many drugs that littered the space. Yet another smile appears on Shadow's face as now calm eyes scan the unneeded dresser. "It seems that Scourge will have another batch to sell before Mephiles stops him for good." With a light push, the drawer is closed, ruby eyes with their old fire catch sight of the large mirror in front of him. The first thing he notices, the smile. It was just so long that it was such a surprise. The red color was gone from his eyes, having been off drugs for a while and gotten plenty of rest. He even got his apatite back. His quills were styled like how they use to as well, the only difference being, his face had such a soft touch to it. Shadow didn't care if he had 'gone soft'. His old self was back, not from the dead but rather reborn. The old him was dead, but some was still present. He only hopes that it is a good fusion of his old self and his new self.

A body in his bed also catches his attention, a small lump of blue covered by a black sheet that had been cleaned. That lump was Sonic. After the main core had burst, Shadow was surprised, the earth shattering rumble snapping him out of his homicidal rage. Grasping onto the bleeding hero, Shadow moved out of there, racing before the machine just a level below him could burst. The stairs were a lost cause. There was no way he could make it up the stairs without hurting him or Sonic. However, while on his way to the fourth wing and back, he saw no other doors that could lead to another escape route, and they were many levels underground. He braved it.

Which was how Shadow gotten so burned. While hoping his way up the wall, Sonic in arms, he had stepped on a rail to get to where he needed. He had slipped, rolling Sonic to the side that would not touch the hot metallic surface. Shadow had badly burned his left side, sliding a short distance angled oddly on his back and side, Sonic held safely off the ground. When the dark creature got to his feet, his fur had already burned to the floor, and so that was ripped off, along with some of his flesh. But none of that had mattered at the time. The air was thick of smoke, and he needed to get Sonic out of there.

Not making another error, Shadow darted out of the building, which he was glad had been evacuated. Leaping up to a roof top, Shadow had dashed home out of sight. Once he reached his apartment, he had called up Tails, frantic and out of breath and in pain. Once the kitsune was headed over, he had placed Sonic on his bed, making sure he was breathing. Shadow knew he would have a hard time telling the young kit that the blue one was perfectly okay when he had gotten to him and that it was him that had beaten him. He'd tell the truth. He never lied before and he sure as hell wasn't gonna start now. When Tails arrived, they began to clean up the hero, checking to make sure he was okay with his wounds the Ultimate Life Form had made. Taking him to the hospital wasn't even an option. Too much media, press, people, police, friends-all would overwhelm the injured hero once he woke up. They decided to wait. Tails was surprised to see Shadow like he was, fur caked with debris and soot, smelling thick of smoke, and bleeding. Shadow was bleeding a lot and it was amazing that he was still alive and conscious for that matter. However, Shadow denied treatment, dragging Tails to were Sonic was laying, also full of soot, bloodied and bruised although Shadow was worse off.

The body in the bed groaned, snapping Shadow out of his thoughts. "My head kinda hurts."

"I'd sure hope so." Shadow stated, almost surprised the hero was up and talking. While the disoriented hero woke, the Ultimate Life Form found his cell phone. Rouge had been so persistent in him getting one, he never bothered. He got one a week ago, to get in better touch with those around him. He had a lot of catching up to do. With a quick text, his attention was back on the reason for both his miserable downfall and his mean to rebuild himself.

Sonic stayed down, blinking rabidly. "I just had the worst dream-I was simply mindin' my own business when Eggman Nega had suddenly captured me and put me in this tank. And I-" Seeing the look on Shadow's face, the burns on his bald fur, he came to the conclusion that what he had been through was not a dream but a reality. "Oh…it…happened…" The blue one let out an awkward chuckle. "Kinda wished it was a dream, ya know?"

"Yes…" Shadow agrees. "I very much do." There was sorrow in his voice, but his face was calm and relieved, even joy was present. He still looked a bit warn out, but still content and peaceful, and Sonic guessed it was because he was alive and…pretty much well.

"Sorry for askin' but…where am I?" Sonic asked the other creature, looking around the dark room. He saw that black curtains were pulled back, allowing light to stretch into the room. There was white carpet, though it was littered with blood stains, knowing that most of it was not actually his. His were fresh, the others were faded. There was a single oak dresser with a mirror intact. On it was a picture of a blonde girl, a few guns and cash located on the surface as well. There was a single leather couch, also black, which blended in with the black walls. There were two doors. One that was closed and the other that was open, which led to a bathroom with a broken mirror.

"My place" was his short and obvious answer.

"Nice. Not very joyful though." Sonic grins, looking up to see the black ceiling with a single chandelier type light, which was quite beautiful with the clear crystals that hung from it.

Shadow frowned for a moment. "I myself haven't been feeling very 'joyful' myself." Was admitted. "However, I've realized that it was my fault and not yours. Where everyone else had moved on, I chose to stay put, in hopes that you would return."

"Thanks" was the dark one's response, slightly confusing him. "Because of you, I was found. I'm free again, and though I have plenty of friends, you were the only one who stuck by my side though I wasn't even there."

Shadow let a rare smile show on his face before letting it drop. "Sonic…about what happened during your rescue…" was started, shame filling him once again.

The hero did nothing but shrug. "Hey, I can't blame you. You were upset and shocked." He knew that was it. He knew the public said he was dead, his care taker had told him that. He had lost time after that, and was quite surprised to hear from the distraught hedgehog that it had been two years. He had honestly thought it was longer than that. "Besides, I don't mind really. First thing I've felt since I was caught. It was refreshin'" the hero grins, cocking his head, showing his playful side.

"It should never have happened."

"A lot of things shouldn't've happened." Sonic explains, eyes traveling down Shadow's body, specifically the left side. His skin had been burned and marred and the fur had either been burned off or shaven. Sonic knew from the explosion before Shadow had arrived and the fire alarm that there was a fire. He guessed that because he himself wasn't damaged with burns, that Shadow had protected him with his own body. A bare peach hand had reached forward, letting his fingers touch the marred skin. There is a slight flinch. "Does it hurt?"

Shadow watched the hand travel over his skin. "At first it did." He answered truthfully. "However, my body is temporarily slowed in it's healing process." He knew what was going to be asked now, there was not denying it and there was no hiding it. And he did not want to.

"Oh?" Sonic was a tad confused, fingers stopping at some tract marks, adding to his confusion. As his fingers danced over the odd scar, emerald eyes caught sight of Shadow lowering his head, pride obviously either bruised or broken. "What are these?" Eyes travel up the appendage, finding many more like it.

There is a slight hesitation. "Those are the reason my body does not work properly though it is only temporary."

"What are they exactly?" Sonic asks again, eyes flicking upward to look Shadow directly in the eyes.

Again, hesitation is present. "Allow me to show you." And with that, Shadow stood up, walking over to his dresser. Sonic couldn't help but gasp at the burns on the other creature. The whole side of his left arm was stripped clean of his fur, the balding and abrasion working it's way up and around his shoulder and shoulder blade. As Shadow opened the top drawer, the azure hero got a full view of his backside, his stomach doing flips. Half of the raven fur that he had grown to like over the years had been removed, replaced with angry red and brown skin that wasn't even. That ugly mark had continued downward, curving slightly down to the left hip and left buttocks, making a sick trial down most of the thin leg. It was hard to believe that Shadow would even heal from this, however, he _was _the Ultimate Life Form and knew that he would actually recover though it would take some time. When side ultimate life form returned, he tilted the box that he had removed from the oak wood.

Green eyes peer inside to see quite a shock. Bags of powers, rolled up paper with dried leaves barely sticking out, containers of pills and empty syringes. Sonic knew exactly what these where. "You…you…" Words could not describe his thoughts.

Shadow kept the dresser drawer in sight for Sonic. "Yes. Shortly after I quit G.U.N. and my search for you was going no where, I turned to drugs to help me deal with my thoughts and emotions." He paused for a moment, Tilting the box back to himself. "Somehow, they went from a means of escape to an attempt to forget you." Black ears flatten as blue ones raise, the marred hedgehog turning back to set the dresser back into his place. "I used heavily because my body kept fighting it and recovering faster. I was never addicted, I just never had a reason or want to stop." Shadow explains, looking at a photo as he slides the dresser drawer back into place. "Not even Maria" is said through sigh, the crimson streaked hedgehog turns to return to his place by Sonic's bed. "Until now that is."

With a sense of pride swelling the hero, Sonic smiles. "Say, what happened to Nega anyway? And why did he catch me? What did he want?" is asked quickly. He had been wondering for years.

It was just the subject Shadow wanted to talk about. "In custody actually." Shadow grins. "I called up G.U.N., explained where the doctor was and what he had in the lowest level. The building's explosion and collapse had caused many deaths." Hearing this Sonic lowered, but knew it couldn't be helped. "As for what he was trying to do, he had started a small company, and when it expanded, he managed to begin hostile take overs of larger companies."

"Why? Eggman always just-"

"That is Ivo Eggman." Shadow corrects. "The man is brilliant however full of himself with little patience. Nega Eggman has that, so his plan took many years, and when he was going to begin the real plan, he needed you out of the picture or else he would be foiled."

"Still…why capture me so for so long when his plan wasn't fully ready?" Sonic asks, perplexed.

"He needed you gone-so that your friends would think you were dead. He relied on your friends to do exactly as they had done. Pull at one another's strings and abandon one another, so that we could not work together and stop him." Shadow explains.

Sonic tilts his head. "Why keep me alive?"

"So you could watch it happen."

"Watch what happen? I still don't know the plan here Shadow." Sonic couldn't help but whine.

With a soft chuckle that was magic to blue ears, Shadow explains what had been on the news and reports that Tails had hacked out of police files, along with G.U.N. files. "His company worked with microchips, which he had started out with. With each electronically company he obtained, he was able to use his programmed chips in each device. He had intended on ridding the world by using machines."

"So he basically did what Eggman had done." It was a statement not a question.

"Similar, only his chips were much more in numbers, and if it weren't for me, he would have succeeded, using that T.V. in your prison cell to show you what he had planned as you watched. Helpless as no one did nothing to help seeing as how everyone had moved onto their domestic lives." Shadow adds, making a mental note to thank Mephiles, along with Mighty and Espio later.

"Oh…guess Nega really did have patience." Sonic comments. "Glad you ruined it." He smirks.

"As am I." Shadow agrees.

A coy smile appears on his muzzle as he recalls what had happened before he was abducted. "Anyway…Shads, I think you're over due for an answer."

Surprised, Shadow looks at the hero, confused. Then it hit him.

"So just to make sure that time hadn't changed you _too _much, I need to make sure that you hadn't changed your mind about me." That ever playful grin is now plastered to Sonic's peach muzzle. "So ask me again."

"Time has not once faltered my feelings for you Sonic." Shadow felt his heart begin to race, nervousness even arising in his body.

"I'm still waiting for the question." Sonic hums, happy to hear the other's answer.

A tad annoyed, Shadow shakes his head. "I've waited twenty nine months to hear your answer and I have to ask again?"

"Yup."

Shadow couldn't help but smile at that. It was worth the wait. "Sonic, would you like to be mine?" He took a different take. The first time he had offered himself. Now he was taking what he wanted.

Leaning forward quickly, Sonic places a light kiss on a tan muzzle. "Of course Shadow." Hearing his answer, Shadow tilted his head slightly, catching a kiss on his lips this time, the hero not pulling away. The Ultimate Life Form felt as if he were on fire, and by the fact that he had already _been _on fire, that was saying something. This kiss, and every kiss after that, seemed as if it gave Shadow life. It helped heal the raven furred creature of his abuse, his pain and suffering. He had waited so long to hear that answer, and he had honestly began to believe he never would hear it.

This kiss is lived pretty short lived however.

"Uhh…this…is…I should have knocked."

Another's voice stops the kiss, two hedgehog turning to see Tails, Cream and their bundle of joy in the girl's arms. After a second look, Cheese was not too far behind, the chao now sporting a halo. "Tails…wow…" He didn't need an explanation. Judging by the baby, Cream and the sudden look of maturity the dusty orange fox now held, Sonic knew that he had missed a lot. "You sure grew up in two years."

"Yeah." Tails replied, walking into the room with his family. "It's so great to see you alive…I…thought you were…" The boy trialed off.

"Don't worry about it. I see you've gotten pretty busy anyway." Sonic chuckles, looking over his company.

"Hello Sonic." Cream greeted. Tails had told her just today that Sonic was alive, and that they were headed over to Shadow's to see him. Surprised, the girl just packed up what was needed and followed her boyfriend, Cheese trailing behind. She had grown too, along with her speech. She wasn't quite as polite or shy, and the innocence wasn't as strong anymore.

"Hey Cream." Sonic waved, facing Tails. "So, how is everybody?"

With an awkward expression, Tails shook his head. "It's best we tell you later Sonic. Let's not ruin the mood we have goin' here."

A tad worried, Sonic brushes it off, not wanting to rush things. "Can you tell me how you've been at least?'

"Yeah." Tails taps on Shadow's shoulder, hinting him to get up. The red streaked hedgehog stood up, settling himself on the foot of the bed as the fox sits on the chair. "For starters, I suppose I should tell you I stopped inventing."

"You what?" Needless to say, Sonic was stunned.

"Well, with searching for you, Cream being pregnant, college and a job, things got overwhelming." He explains, not an ounce of guilt or shame in his face, looking over to his girl to see her swaying the stirring bunny slightly, stroking the snout with tenderness. "I had more important things." Is added with a smile, which in turn, caused Sonic to smile, feeling warm at how much his little brother had grown and how well he was doing. "I had to drop out of college too, but I'll start up again once the kid is grown a bit though I'm taking on line classes when I can."

"That's good." Sonic keeps his smile though surprised as hell to hear that one.

"Shadow helped me so much" Tails adds, knowing that to be true. At first, he just clung to him-in a way that was somehow not annoying. But as time passed by, it was clear that the tails and bioengineered hedgehog needed one another to stay sane. "I don't know what I would have done without him."

Hearing this, a blue head turns, green eyes catching sight of Shadow. "You helped him out?"

"We helped each other. I see why you've adopted him as your little brother." Shadow admits, knowing full well that he too had done the exact same thing.

"Thank you…so much…"

"It was no problem to me." Is said softly. "Though I believe I was a problem for him."

Tails let out a laugh, making clear to everyone that what was said was true. Sonic knew he missed so much.

A woman's voice interrupted the moment, ready to make one herself. Cream's eyes light up with glee, smile on her face. "He's up." She states, moving over to the bed. Leaning over, Cream extends her arms like she had done to Shadow not long ago in a hospital room. Almost on cue, the green eyed hedgehog sits up, resting his back on the pillow, which was pressed up against the headboard. He stared blankly at the little bundle that was being given to him. "Open your arms Sonic." Is spoken softly through a giggle. Sonic does as told, suddenly realizing that he knew nothing of babies, and had the oddest feeling he would be learning fast.

"Sonic," Tails starts. "I'd like you to meet Copper, my son." Blue eyes watch with pride as his pride and joy rests in Sonic's arms, the most puzzled expression on such a normally confident and cocky face.

"Copper," Cream smiles, tail wagging as she moves slightly, Shadow moving closer to see his boyfriend with a baby. "Meet your Uncle Sonic." The rabbit girl speaks softly.

Sonic smiles, watching large light blue eyes blink in confusion but fascination. Familiar bangs in a messy but organized bunched right in the middle of his head. Large orange ears stuck out of the blanket that was wrapped loosely around the small fuzz ball. White cheeks puffing at the cheeks, making them appear quite large but adorable. As a peach hand stroked a puffy cheek, little orange hands lightly grasped onto him, pulling a digit close. Everyone couldn't help but let out a small laugh as baby Copper opened his mouth, both pulling the peach finger closer and lifting himself slightly. Sonic let a big grin grow on his face as Copper tried to chew on his finger, only managing to nom on him a little bit.

"Hello Copper." The hero greets for the first time. "I'm your Uncle Sonic. You'll be seein' a lot more of me now. Promise." Sonic declares through a smile.

This may be different from what he was use to twenty nine months ago, but it was still the same place.

Sonic was home again.

*Dear god I can't believe I put this. I had been boggling my mind on what to do with Storm because I had an idea for everyone else, and I couldn't just abandon him for good. I had asked my friend, Gangsta Fluffy, had said-as a joke-that I should put him with Big the Cat. Now-Captain Oblivious(my other friend)and I had laughed about it. We all did. And it was funny. But then jokes came up and as I was writing this I'm actually screaming "no no no no no!" at my computer screen…I fought off the temptations for a while, but I failed at the end. Fluffy(who fully accept that we are yaoi fangirls and even helps out even though he is straight)said they could be 'fishing' buddies. We laughed. Then I realized how true that was. Storm is an albatross, which is a large sea bird. And Big fishes in any source of water really. So, my mind had wondered, and when it does, there's no stopping it. So the two began a relationship with him, the two living nearby and spending much time either swimming or fishing…and now I've gotta make a story about it. Shoot me.

Please shoot me before I do something I regret and cannot stop.

'Nother Note From Skippy: And about Knuckles and Rouge's relationship, I feel SOO bad because I love them together. I have decided to make a story branch off to mend them back together. Just give me some time. It'll probably be short, but at least I might make a happy ending and not a bittersweet one…so yeah.


End file.
